Relationships Run The World

I attended the most recent Founders x Business Breakdowns Austin event in late September. To say the least, it was fire. The following Wednesday, I received a text from Jerry; “How was the event? I was expecting a write up in the MML but guess it didn’t make the cut.” My, was he wrong. I was simply letting some of my emotions and thoughts percolate – I have an inherent bias toward immediate action, but this experience needed some stillness. My ideas needed to steep; an intellectual example of osmosis and diffusion. 

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It had been a long week at work when I originally sat down to write this, a week after the event. All I wanted to do was cuddle up on the couch with my wife and watch the second episode of Mr. McMahon – a Netflix docuseries that delves into the controversial reign of professional wrestling promoter Vince McMahon. But – as I’ve often felt compelled to but don’t always do – my inner critic told me to shut up, sit down, and type. While my wife was putting our son to bed that night, I cracked open the introduction to Playing from the Rough, took a picture with my phone, and sent it to Chris as I read about Jimmie James playing Congressional Country Club. This was one of the relationships I built while at Founders. I also had multiple conversations with Jake, an hour and a half long Zoom with Matt, lunch with Cedric, a text exchange with Clayton, and Jordi and I are locked in for next week, to name a few. To say the conference had a genuine impact on me would be a gross understatement.

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The weekend started with four gentlemen (Jake, Bryan, Kevin, and me) separately being dropped off at a nearby church, the supposed pickup spot where a shuttle was to then whisk us to campus. One person was wearing a “BC” hat, for Boston College. We started talking about the school; Jake mentioned that his wife went to BC, around the time Damien Woody was there. I loved that description, grounding us in a football era, and followed with how my wife was there during the Matt Ryan reign, having actually dated another player on the team. The gentleman wearing the BC hat then surprisingly said that he was the best man in my wife’s ex boyfriend’s wedding – think about the chances of that for a second! We eventually realized the shuttle wasn’t coming. So, we took our destiny into our own hands and called an Uber to take us to campus. My wife’s ex boyfriend’s best man and I rode together. We continued to exchange pleasantries, each feeling a sense of groundedness knowing a few of the upcoming speakers and feeling connected in the anxiety and excitement of the upcoming conference. I felt like the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air as we approached campus, pulling up to “a house about seven or eight / And I yelled to the [Uber] ‘Yo’, Holmes, smell ya later’” – I knew if this random (read: serendipitous) connection was any harbinger of what was to come, I was in a for a hell of a weekend.

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The depth of relationships formed and folks’ willingness to engage was inspiring. The unstructured and unplanned side conversations provided additional texture to the conference, enabling serendipitous, thoughtful, and enriching dialogue. After all, everyone in attendance was there in some way, shape, or form, because they listened or had a connection to Founders or Business Breakdowns. Podcasting can essentially become the soundtrack to our lives. It allows for a certain intimacy; listeners get to know you better than if they were simply hearing your song or reading your book. They can listen to you while they do other things: drive, walk, workout. There is a level of comfort that enables a podcaster to get “closer” because the listener doesn’t have to devote their entire attention to it; they are also able to listen as often as they’d like. With audio, it’s both a conscious and subconscious seeping into your psyche. It takes a certain kind of person to listen to these podcasts about some of the greatest entrepreneurs / business builders in history. It takes another kind, and sometimes the same kind, of person to attend a conference based on those podcasts – which makes listenership and presence at the conference that much more intentional and purposeful. 

The benefit of podcasting lies in its ability to connect others by offering you the opportunity to consistently put your long form thoughts into the ether in a zeitgeist where attention comes at a premium. Even if you are able to capture someone’s attention, though, it’s fleeting at best. The alchemy of effective curation is a community of intentional and purposeful dialogue without the container being overly prescriptive. The conference provided fertile ground for what Matt Ridley famously described as “ideas hav[ing] sex”, bringing people together from various walks of life who are interested in learning how to find, develop, build, invest in, and lead durable businesses. I met people that became acquaintances and have turned some of those acquaintances into friends. And while I respect Chatham House Rules – you had to be there ☺ — I will share a few random anecdotes and aphorisms that underscore the mantra of the conference, that relationships run the world.

Books are made by books – the right information is priceless. I almost fell out of my chair when I heard the first part. It’s so obvious and has so much wisdom packed into it. The power in writing is the ability to share ideas and information. It sounds trivial, but that’s why reading is fundamental. It’s tough to sit down with a book and just look at it, absorb it, and then act on it. It’s far easier to listen to a podcast or talk to others to gain information. But there is something about grappling with a text, rereading parts, and thinking about it for oneself. If one has intellectual curiosity, one can access and learn almost anything. Notice I said access, which clearly plays a role, but as a mentor described why he chose banking over sales & trading – “if I can read about it, I can figure it out.”

Money flows as a function of storytelling. Ain’t that the truth. When you look at some of the most well-known inventors, investors, politicians, and athletes, you see that storytelling is a part of the success. Now, their storytelling either told the future and / or explained the past, but no matter what, it was words that captivated the hearts and minds of would-be customers because they got to feel like they were a part of something. I often think of the weight of narrative, and how “winners write history” – there is a fine line between success and failure (my mind is wandering and this will be elucidated in another post). As I laid in bed watching the end of the Virginia Tech | Miami football game (Sept 27th), I couldn’t help but think of the narratives around this game and how different the stories would’ve been if VT had in fact won on that Hail Mary as time expired. Nonetheless, Miami proved victorious, snatching victory from the jaws of defeat, then #8 in the country and they marched on – winners.

Make money from customers vs. investors. There is truly a gift in focusing on customers: look at all the work that Jobs, Bezos, etc. put in versus simply telling the best story just to get your next funding round. The latter enables the founder / VC to get wealthier without ever having created a sustainable or earth-shattering business. To be clear, there is much more nuance here as the power law drives VC – the understanding that only a handful of companies will return the fund while most are, understandably, going to fail, as well as the inherent difference between creating a company and a business. We could also talk about interest rates, etc. Yet there is something so beautiful about a closely held business – family and founder led enterprises that grow, evolve, and show resilience throughout the years. This too likely comes with the underpinnings of family issues, access, secrecy, etc., but my point isn’t to sweep issues under the rug or feign ignorance to them, but rather reinforce the fine line mentioned above. The difference between success and failure as defined in Founders, Business Breakdowns, and through various conversations with business owners is consistently illustrated by the fact that there were multiple times when, if the ball bounced another direction, there would have been a very different outcome, sliding door moments – thus the human condition, the inability to predict the future. Nonetheless, the relentless focus on customers and providing a service remains critical to a companies’ success and its evolution to a business.

Mute the world, build your own. This stuck to my ribs like oatmeal! I’ve had many people tell me over the years to turn down the volume and focus on the task at hand. There’s discourse around signal versus noise in this busy world, but the “mute the world” message was poignant. Business = make someone’s life better. The commentary around building companies versus financial instruments brought me back to reading Good to Great and other timeless works by Jim Collins. As Collins’ wrote: “To go from good to great requires transcending the curse of competence. It requires the discipline to say, ‘Just because we are good at it—just because we’re making money and generating growth—doesn’t necessarily mean we can become the best at it.’ The good-to-great companies understood that doing what you are good at will only make you good; focusing solely on what you can potentially do better than any other organization is the only path to greatness.” Again, this reinforces the ability to turn down the volume, even if you’re good at something, to hone in on what could potentially lead to greatness. In some cases, greatness also means oneness as it requires a kind of humble discipleship to your own individual gifts.

Collins went on to write, “The most effective investment strategy is a highly undiversified portfolio when you are right. As facetious as that sounds, that’s essentially the approach the good-to-great companies took. ‘Being right’ means getting the Hedgehog Concept; ‘highly undiversified’ means investing fully in those things that fit squarely within the three circles and getting rid of everything else.” The Hedgehog Concept, created by Jim Collins, is “a simple, crystalline concept that flows from deep understanding about the intersection of three circles: 1) what you are deeply passionate about, 2) what you can be the best in the world at, and 3) what best drives your economic or resource engine.” Said another way, ‘getting rid of everything else’ is muting the world. Deciphering your distinct gifts and leaning into the Hedgehog Concept is how you “build your own” world, business, culture, etc. Trying to achieve greatness is scary though, because there is no guarantee of success.

Intros are like currency. This immediately reminded me of some of the best advice I’ve ever received: “It’s not what you know. It’s not who you know. It’s who sent you”. Let that sink in. The potency of an intro is often correlated to how quickly or seriously (as in, willing to make time) one responds. Someone availing their network to you is powerful. I won’t go so far as to assume instant credibility, but the co-sign is critical in at least opening the door. It’s on you to deliver and develop the relationship once the door is propped open. I often make intros with the subject line: Legister Links. It makes it easier to find amongst the deluge of emails in one’s inbox, and by putting my name next to it, I hope it means a little extra. That said, I offer another comment that resonated on this topic: a cold intro is better than a bad intro. That’s real. Again, who sent you…sometimes it’s better to go on your own than to have someone whose reputation isn’t going to help unlock doors. 

Volume builds quality. “I’m not trying to be efficient; I’m trying to be great.” I struggle with sometimes choosing not to write because the perfect idea isn’t ready. But I know that’s a cop out. Shut up. Sit down. And type. So much of writing is about editing, as many have said. The practice is getting the words on the page, taming the thoughts in the wild, and stripping away what doesn’t belong. Many great artists, musicians, and athletes talk about this…As Michael Jordan said: “I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” Kobe Bryant has the most missed shots in NBA history (14,481); that record will likely be surpassed by LeBron James early this season. Nonetheless, they are considered some of the greatest of all time. Kobe, Jordan, LeBron, and many other elite athletes, similar to business builders, are known for their work ethic, output, and brilliance. If you want greatness, you pay the price. As Kobe said to Byron Scott: “If I work out three times a day and all these other guys who are so-called great players work out just for practice, they just work out that one time a day; [...] over a five-year period they can’t catch me. I’ve worked on my body. I’ve worked on my footwork. I’ve worked on my shot. So five, ten years from now they can’t catch me, they that far behind.” Here’s another sports statistic: Alex Rodriguez is 5th all time in HR and 5th all time in strikeouts. The quantity is important because it’s how you get quality. Furthermore, in baseball, slugging percentage differs from batting average – all hits are not valued equally, a necessary nuance and one that speaks to the quantity of at bats potentially positioning you for better quality. When you see more pitches, take more shots, or increase the volume, if training properly, that should enable one to have better pattern recognition, “see the ball” better, etc. In everyday life, efficiency in your work is fairly common through apps, assistants, courses, but being great is an earned secret that one must develop. It’s the volume of work that helps create the quality output! Mamba mentality.

You don’t win in the market because you are the best, you win because you’re unique (new + different). The goal is to be N-of-1 for someone, not absolute. Learn how to speak to customers. Preach! As I’ve often heard and learned, the most competition is on the traditional path. Because that’s what’s expected, most people are doing it. So, how do you differentiate yourself? By having the same Northface in a different color. I’ve written about this metaphor before, but it essentially means, “be a part of the club, but be unique”. You can switch Northface to Canada Goose, Moncler, or whatever the new dope jacket is today. And you can also switch the jacket period to country club, team, podcast, neighborhood, school, etc. At the end of the day, there’s a certain barometer that must be met to be “in the club” – but once you’re in, you still want a different color to be unique. Ain’t that human culture; part of the tribe, but still one of one. If you’re friends with everyone, you’re friends with no one. The list of aphorisms is endless, but again, by doing the work, providing value, and finding people who will pay for that service because they find it valuable, you have a chance (not a guarantee) to win. Maximize for service. Stack unfair advantages.

The list goes on, but my main takeaway from the entire weekend event was this: “Do the work”. I actually scribbled that in my notebook several times – I took copious notes given all the nuggets of wisdom dropped throughout the main-stage sessions. As I listened to the likes of David Senra, Matt Reustle, Bryce Roberts, Jeremy Giffon, Jimmy Soni, Shegun Otulana, and many others, it became increasingly apparent that what enabled each of these men to grace the stage was the dedication each of them put into their craft. They became an authority on something.

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I recently received this text from a friend I made at Founders: “I got my first MML today. I think this is going to wind up costing me a lot of time. In a good way. So many things to think about. I had to remind myself to get up and get on with my day. I can’t imagine how much work goes into these, but I can truly say I am looking forward to the next one and the next one and the next one. Thank you!” 

Messages like this are not the only reason why I do it, but they do bring joy to my being and help me keep going. And while the MML isn’t (yet) a book, this is akin to what Eric Jorgenson describes as: the difficulty in calculating the Return on Investment (ROI) of a book (or in this case, a blog) because there are tailwinds in a million tiny ways. Eric talked a lot about the power of a physical book, and it got my juices flowing about potentially wanting to write one someday. You forget how novel your knowledge is. But maybe that, too, is for another blog post. 

I’m often left wondering if Al Pacino knew that The Godfather was going to change the trajectory of his career while he was filming. I wonder if certain artists know a certain song is going to be a hit, a classic, while recording in the studio. I wonder what Kobe was feeling when he dropped eighty-one points against Jalen Rose and the Toronto Raptors on Jan. 22nd, 2006. But to be clear, I don’t mean it in the way of, did they manifest it, but rather, did they know it. As I walked around campus during the event, I sensed that this was the start of something good, and that a decade from now, David Senra, Matt Reustle, and others will be household names. Not because they definitely want to be, but because podcasting is still early innings, misunderstood, and it’s one of the few mediums where long form is more appreciated and easily digestible. It’s essentially a golf round for your ears; a beautiful game that can be sped up, slowed down, listening to one speaker, or multiple, easy to have on, but hard to get right. As such, Founders x Business Breakdowns weekend brought these podcasts and speakers to life; relationships are important because they feed reality back to you. The hundred plus attendees and the variety of people proved that these podcasts transcend class and vintage, while also galvanizing people to engage with and share the ideas. Greatness can’t happen without facing reality. Yet, as the conference weekend seemed to convey; the irony is that the only way to achieve true individual greatness is through relationships. Because, as I continue to learn, relationships run the world.

*Note* Special shoutout to all my editors and thought partners on this piece: JF, KG, LB, CP, JB, MC.