How to Change
“Embrace change.” That was the message given by the commencement speaker at my college graduation. Back then, I was enamored with the prospect of moving to New York City and launching my career. I was passionate about proving myself to myself but was unaware of how comprehensively I’d need to “change” to transition into the next phase of my life.
Change brings us out of our comfort zones. Without it, it is too easy to fall into patterns that human nature seeks out. Proven to me over and over again is the growth that comes from raw variations to these patterns. The new perspectives gained, the recontextualizations of our past problems into the larger picture, the reassurance that there is more one can expect from the world. Over time, one’s natural response to falling into patterns changes to resistance rather than acceptance; one begins to seek change for change’s sake. Fear, uncertainty and doubt soon become superseded by faith in what change can bring, and one’s decisions take the shape of a positive, iteratively constructed trajectory.
“Regardless of the staggering dimensions of the world about us, the density of our ignorance, the risks of catastrophes to come, and our individual weakness within the immense collectivity, the fact remains that we are absolutely free today if we choose to will our existence in its finiteness, a finiteness which is open on the infinite. And in fact, any man who has known real loves, real revolts, real desires, and real will knows quite well that he has no need of any outside guarantee to be sure of his goals; their certitude comes from his own drive.”
~ Simone de Beauvoir, The Ethics of Ambiguity
How, though, do we know what or when to change? How do we ensure that the trajectory that change takes us on is one that maximizes our true potential?
Fast forward a few years to a New Year’s Eve dinner with Sean and a well-curated group of personalities and backgrounds. As expected, the conversation is an engaged one; the word of the night seemed to be “intention.” At the time, I didn’t quite understand what people meant by wanting to be “intentional”; its applications seemed to be broad and subjective. Over that next year, however, as I kept this word in mind, I began to understand it. As I grew in my self-awareness, the clearer my definition of “intention” became, and I found my focus shifting to feeding this positive feedback loop. I became dedicated to pursuing a clearer definition of my own identity and consequently I began to see the changes I made in my life lead to a more focused form of progress. In addition to embracing Change, I was now getting a sense for how to direct it.
Gaining self-awareness, however, is something of a paradox. By exploring more about one’s place in the world, the ego begins to dissolve and give way to a grander, global sense of purpose. What is the function of one’s own progress if not to contribute to the progress of our entire society? The current state of the world has been collectively built by individuals in history overcoming various trials to spread greater understanding of our shared values and potential, and it’s up to those living in the present to inflict change on the future. Each iteration of your own self- awareness better enables iterations of progress in the world around you.
What, then, does the MML mean to me? The MML is a microcosm of the global community. It serves as a mirror for your own perspectives, a reminder of the purpose you strive towards and most importantly, a community of people that push towards greater truths. It is a platform for individuals to influence patterns of change in each other and a landing spot to bring others that want to contribute to the progress. How will you bring the lessons you’ve learned to those around you? How will you create a greater sense of purpose for both yourself and your community? By listening, learning and participating in this community, I hope we all can learn how to engage our world for the better.
“An individual has not begun to live until he can rise above the narrow horizons of his particular individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity. And this is one of the big problems of life, that so many people never quite get to the point of rising above self...so they end up the tragic victims of self-centeredness. They are the people who live an eternal ‘I’ ... They start out, the minute you talk with them, talking about what they can do, what they have done...where they have been...who they know...and how much money they have. Now, we can say to a certain extent that persons in this situation are persons who have really never grown up...For you see, a child is inevitably, necessarily egocentric. He is a bundle of his own sensations, clamoring to be cared for...When people become mature, they are to rise above this. When one matures...he turns himself to higher loyalties. He gives himself to something outside of himself. He gives himself to causes that he lives for and sometimes will even die for. He comes to the point that now he can rise above his individualistic concerns. And so you see people who are apparently selfish; it isn’t merely an ethical issue but it is a psychological issue. They are the victims of arrested development, and they are still children. They haven’t grown up.”
~ Martin Luther King Jr.